Hey Tone, Peter King tweeted me that you didn’t lead the league in smiles this year. Everything OK?
You know how with less than two minutes left and a 24-point lead, we went for it on 4th-and-3 and I threw a deep touchdown pass? That was only ‘cause I love this game so goshdarned much.
This is kind of a secret, but the truth is, I’ve choked almost as many times as you in the playoffs. But because I throw my arms in the air, sprint down the field and leap into my receivers’ arms after every touchdown pass, no one’s noticed.
Psst, you remember how a couple days after my Dad died, I came out on Monday night football and played an awesome game? Well, I always hated that fucker when he was alive.
Listen, me and the wife are in room 1205 at the Four Seasons if you and Jessica want to stop by. As long as Jess doesn’t mind a little stubble burn on her thighs, if you know what I’m saying.
Just keep this between you and me for now, but I’m thinking about retiring after the season.
I see you.