Your Saturday Antivirals

“Woke up Election Day, skies gunpowder and shades of gray/Beneath a dirty sun, I whistled my time away” — Bruce Springsteen

Election Day is a mere 10 days away, so this is an all-politics edition of the Saturday Antivirals. Let’s do this.

The real tragedy of the 2010 mid-term election is that the ridiculous fringe candidates are getting so much attention that we’re losing sight of the danger of so many almost-fringe candidates actually taking office.

Yes, Christine O’Donnell and the Rent is Too High Guy and the Texas hick condoning violent overthrow of the government are amusing. But none of them are going to get elected. And while we’re all laughing at them, and making witch/masturbation jokes, legitimately crazy Tea Party and far-right candidates are inching closer to victory.

Joe Miller is going to get elected in Alaska, despite an already-growing list of allegations against him, including the one about handcuffing a reporter trying to ask him questions. Two Tea Party candidates are going to take House seats in Arkansas, Bill Clinton’s home state. TeePees are also expected to win new seats in Michigan, Arizona, Utah, Georgia and Wisconsin (where Ron Johnson is running a truly brilliant campaign).

FiveThirtyEight currently gives Republicans a 75 percent chance of taking over the House, with a significantly smaller chance of capturing the Senate. But just the House would be bad enough. If we’ve learned anything the past two years, it’s that the current Democrat-led Congress is incapable of acting, of accomplishing anything, and of standing up to minority Republican challenges. If Democrats have been this inefficient, this easily cowed, imagine what the next two years will be like when they don’t actually control both the House and Senate. Hint: remember the ’80s, when Democrats held a Congressional majority but swooned like schoolgirls every time Ronald Reagan winked at them.

What can be be done? Probably nothing. The die is cast. But hey, the George W. Bush presidency and the Contract for America both worked out great, so strap in for some more.

Democrats are rudderless, and message-less. It’s nothing new. We’ve seen it all before. The stereotypes of the two parties are essentially true: Republicans are evil. Democrats are meek. Life goes on.

What else is going on out there?

“I am Governor Jerry Brown. My aura smiles and never frowns…” Say one thing for California…they keep it interesting. Ol’ Moonbeam is poised to reclaim the governorship, if he can hold off Meg Whitman for another week and a half.

Republicans want to appeal Obama’s health care bill if they take control of Congress. Americans, as always, don’t know which way is up.

Hey, you know Clarence Thomas? He might not be a totally stand-up guy. True story.


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Filed under Internet Has AIDS, Politics Has AIDS, The Dilemma

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