Why They Hate Us

Some quotes from internet news stories about Black Friday:

Early signs pointed to a solid turnout for the traditional start to the holiday shopping season.

Holiday shopping season. I don’t know exactly where to begin.

“I’m looking at the TV and it says save $70 and I’m like, come on, you’ve got to be kidding,” said Sanjay Patil as he and other shoppers waited outside a Best Buy Co Inc store in Princeton, New Jersey, before midnight, even though the electronics retailer didn’t open until 5 a.m. “If it’s Black Friday, it has to be 100 or 120 bucks savings minimum,” he said.

There’s no better way to show your disapproval of a store’s prices than waiting outside for six hours to buy stuff from them anyway.

“People have this spending freeze fatigue, after two years of not spending money,” Seema Pajula, a partner in Deloitte LLC’s retail practice, said while out with shoppers in Chicago.

Finally, our long national nightmare is over. I don’t care what anybody says, being an American who isn’t able to spend like a drunken sailor is way worse than being a child mining diamonds in Sierra Leone.

“We’ve been up since 8 a.m. Thursday,” Krystal Mercer, a Charlotte, North Carolina, city employee, said as she shopped at a Wal-Mart. “By the time you want to sleep Thursday night, you start getting excited about the stores opening early Friday. The adrenaline just gets going.”

She must be a lot of fun at the Thanksgiving dinner table.

Toys R Us didn’t even wait until Friday to launch its Black Friday bargain bonanza. For the first time in the chain’s history, all of Toys R Us’ stores opened at 10 p.m. on Thanksgiving instead of the usual midnight opening.

I’m disappointed in you, Geoffrey the Giraffe. Making your employees leave their families on Thanksgiving night to sell plastic crap to shoppers who left their families? Is Toys R Us not the happiest place on earth after all?

Compared to last year, consumers seems to have better thought out their Black Friday shopping strategy, said Marshal Cohen, lead retail analyst with NPD Group.

“Because of stores staggering their Black Friday openings from midnight to 5:00 a.m., this has really helped shoppers plan their moves,” he said.

“Shoppers are being more strategic and less impulsive,” he said. “They have done their homework on who has the best deals, they have a little bigger budget this year but they’re sticking to it, and they’re not rushing into a big-ticket purchase.”

Unfortunately, that analysis was better than anything I heard during football yesterday.

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Filed under David Simon Cowell, Politics Has AIDS

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