Jered Weaver and The Good Guy Fallacy

Uh oh. Jered Weaver is getting pretty close to joining Gwyneth Paltrow, Rick Reilly and Morrissey on this blog’s official Enemies List.

Weaver is being hailed as a hero in some circles for signing a five-year, $85 million contract extension with the Angels and passing up the chance to become a free agent.

Here’s why that doesn’t make him a good guy:

Whenever an athlete resigns with his current team for anything considered less than optimal market value, we hear all about what a great guy he is for giving a “hometown discount” and staying with his loyal fans and teammates.

Bullshit.

First of all, in most of these cases the player in question is minimizing risk in exchange for that somewhat smaller contract. If Jered Weaver blows out an elbow tomorrow and never pitches again, he’s still ensured of receiving all 85 million of those dollars.

Secondly, giving a “hometown discount” does not prove that a player is inherently less greedy and selfish than those that become free agents.

Weaver said this about his new deal:

“If $85 million is not enough to take care of my family and other generations of my family, I’m pretty stupid. How much money do you really need in life?”

Good question. But you had this option, Jered: you could have received significantly more money from your asshole billionaire owner or some other asshole billionaire owner. Then, if you really only need 85 mill to set yourself up for life, you could GIVE THE REST TO FUCKING CHARITY.

If Weaver had signed a $115 million contract, let’s say that after taxes that means he would have had an extra $15 million lying around to help fund cancer research, feed the hungry, comfort terminally ill children or do any number of good, righteous things. Instead you let some billionaire buy another yacht, house AND slave with that money. Not cool, Jered.

Weaver, and every other athlete who has made a similar choice, is turning down the opportunity to play Robin Hood and help the communities they profess to love. But thank God that generations of Weavers are going to live in the luxury to which they’ve grown accustomed.

Also: good guys don’t throw at other people’s heads.

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Filed under Sports Has AIDS, The Dilemma

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